Kimestry

Last week I got to the point where I was feeling overwhelmed. If I allowed myself, I could work twenty four hours a day. Keeping up that pace, however, is not feasible. I was beginning to feel the strain of it all. I felt it so much so that I was beginning to shut down. I was not motivated to continue working. I simply could not keep moving forward without recharging. So on my day off, I checked into a hotel near the beach for a much needed personal retreat. When most people think of a vacation they think of sight seeing and exploring someplace foreign to them. Instead, I retreated to an area that I knew well. I spent hours on the couch watching crime dramas on television in my hotel loft suite. I walked. I drank some wine and ate lots of snacks. I spent very little time on the Internet. I did not dine in restaurants, but opted instead to go to the market and eat in the suite. You may be thinking that this doesn't sound like much of a vacation, but to me it was. You see, the k...

I believe that unarmed truth and unconditional love will have the final word in reality. This is why right temporarily defeated is stronger than evil triumphant. -- Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., Nobel Prize Acceptance Speech, December 10, 1964 Today we celebrate the legacy of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. To commemorate this day, I went for a walk in nature while I listened to one of Dr. King's speeches. It was a speech given to celebrate the 100th anniversary of the writing of the Declaration of Independence. In it, he talked about the promises that America had not yet fulfilled. He discussed police brutality, unequal pay, and segregated education. I found myself in tears as I listened to all the obstacles facing Black Americans during that time. I found myself in tears because much of what Dr. King said still applies today. After I had a moment to grieve the loss of Dr. King as well as the sadder chapters of our history, I found myself wishing that as a society we could say that D...

I live near a mall. That usually isn’t important or relevant except now it’s Christmastime. Nearly every time I forget not to drive past the mall parking lot I say a choice expletive. Holidays can be a stressful time. It seems that I have so many errands that I wonder how I ever got any of them done when I wasn’t on vacation from work. In addition to errands, there are the usual responsibilities like keeping my exercise routine going, maintaining my meditation practice, and keeping in touch with family and friends. The additional holiday responsibilities can put a lot of pressure on all of us and I have learned how important it is to do things to remain grounded. So in the middle of all of my frantic running around the other day, I decided to stop at the beach. I only had fifteen minutes to spare and just enough change to feed the meter. I took off my shoes and walked across the sand. I stood near a lifeguard tower and watched the birds and the ocean waves. I watched the surfers r...

In a previous post I shared that I’ve experienced a lot of loss recently. In some cases friends have moved away and in other cases friends are no longer friends. Several people I know have made their transitions. As I talk to friends, they are experiencing much of the same thing. When I try to hold on to what was, in the face of things changing, it causes me to suffer. I see that. I came up with an analogy to help myself understand why we have to release what was, in order to embrace what is. I like to think about what I want to hold onto as being in my hand. I envision my fingers clasped tightly into a fist to keep it in my hand. What I have come to realize is that as long as my hand is closed around that past situation, event, or relationship, Spirit cannot place anything new into it. So I am opening my hand and trusting that God will fill it again with situations that are more aligned with my highest good. Just like a closed mouth doesn't get fed, a closed fist doesn't...

Every act is an act of self-definition. ~Neale Donald Walsch Life seems crazy sometimes. On a daily basis, we are inundated by responsibilities that seem overwhelming. There are multiple roles that we fulfill: husband, wife, son, daughter, employee or employer, sister, brother, mom and dad. There are bills to pay and those vacations we desire to take but feel that we cannot afford. Sometimes our resources appear very lacking. Other times, our health can be less than optimal. In addition to all of that, we are constantly subjected to prevailing thought forms in society that would convince us that all is definitely lost. The news brings us reports of school shootings, a discordant government, and economic collapse. The question then becomes, how do we maintain a feeling of peacefulness and centeredness in the face of all of these responsibilities and all of this bad news? One way to do this is to consciously and strategically expose ourselves to positivity in order to balance ...

October has been an interesting month. Several seeming setbacks have occurred and relationships with some loved ones appear very fragile. Sometimes I've been tempted to "throw in the towel". Other times I've been tempted to perform a spiritual bypass. What's spiritual bypass? It's when you are feeling really badly but you attempt to skip the grieving and anger and move straight to happiness because it just feels better. And most of the time it doesn't work. Why? Because underneath the "fake it til you make it", your true inner core is hurting. To loosely borrow Course in Miracles speaker Jacob Glass' expression, "It's like putting pink icing on a cake made of feces." At times like these I remember that I am not my feelings. My feelings are human experiences that I cannot bypass. I can, however, be kind to myself and walk through these emotions. As Abraham Hicks advises, we cannot necessarily move from sad to happy, but ...

Recently I had a friend unexpectedly stop returning my phone calls. That friend also de-friended me on Facebook. What's interesting is that I have no idea why. Any attempts to call and discuss whether there's a problem were met with silence. I felt sad and confused. I was left to ponder what I had done wrong. After thinking for awhile, I could not come up with anything that would cause someone to stop speaking to me. I'm just not one to mistreat a friend. If I do something wrong, I apologize. Yet, I cannot make amends if I do not know what I did wrong. Fortunately, I was encouraged by another friend to stop taking it personally and to allow myself to feel compassion for this uncommunicative friend. A fundamental spiritual concept was made popular through the writings of Don Miguel Ruiz in his wonderful book The Four Agreements. In it, he discusses how much of the pain and suffering we endure is a result of taking things personally. The truth is that when people do th...

I must be willing to give up what I am in order to become what I will be. ~Albert Einstein This past weekend a beloved high school voice teacher, Mr. Pressman, gathered former students and friends together for a day in the park. The occasion, from an outside perspective, was melancholy. Our former teacher has the appearance of terminal cancer and we were there to celebrate his life and give him hugs. Some of us may have even felt that we were there to say goodbye. As we stood in line to greet him and caught up with old friends, the occasion almost seemed to transform itself. Instead of focusing on saying goodbye and what to say as we did in the beginning, we started focusing on the best way to get to him and avoid the line that was forming. Do we cut in with a friend or catch him as he walks to the facilities? Can we pull rank as "more mature" alumni? Instead of crying we were laughing at the t-shirt he wore which read, "I'm not dead yet." Instead of mourn...

I once saw a funny picture on Facebook that read, “The Five Symptoms of Laziness.” Beneath the title there was a list that had been started with a number one followed by NOTHING. No task, no number two or three—nothing! The image really made me laugh. It also caused me to reflect on how many times I have promised myself that I would do something and found some reason not to do it, put it off, or found something else to do instead. Sometimes it could be a small task like washing the dishes that gets postponed, but sometimes it’s an important task like writing a blog post that will inspire others. What is it that gets in the way of my taking a step toward my goals? ME! I do that. How can one overcome the phenomenon of getting in one’s own way? One strategy I have utilized successfully is making appointments with myself. I write down a step toward my goal in my daily planner, in this case spending more time sharing my gifts as a writer and inspiring others, and I hold that time...

When I was really young the song “Control” by Janet Jackson was really enticing. The thought of being in control of every aspect of our lives can be intoxicating not only when we are children under the supervision of our parents, but also when we are adults facing all of the challenges that life offers. As an international speaker, I often speak to audiences about stress management. One of the many things that can cause us increased stress is trying to be in control of all of the circumstances of our lives. At times this can extend to the people in our lives and their behaviors and choices. It’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking that if the people closest to us would just do what we think they should do then all of life would be in divine order. They’d be happier and, more importantly, we would be happier. The cost of this thinking is a loss of the kind of intimacy that can exist between people who love each other. I’m not just speaking of romantic relationships, but all ...

Lately my “to do list” has been waking me up in the morning. Juggling five part time jobs and all of my creative and social activities has required nothing short of Martha Stewartesque, genius planning. Before going to bed and as soon as I open my eyes, the list starts running. It is endless and, taken all at once, is extremely overwhelming. “Hyperattention” to the little details of living have the potential to cause stress and anxiety. So what’s the cure? The present of the present. It sounds like a paradox, but it is true. Being present to the present moment decreases the stress and anxiety that our endless parade of tasks can create. I’ve heard it said, “How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time.” Although I do not endorse eating elephants (they are beautiful creatures after all), the message of the saying is clear. When we look at a large task or a long to do list, it seems as though the relative level of difficulty in achieving it is tremendous. However, when we fo...

"Why didn't they accept the payment?", the teller at the bank asked innocently. "It's a long story", I offered. This was the upset of the day that got me where I needed to be. I was getting "sick and tired" of being "sick and tired." So many things seemed to be going wrong in my life--I'd been sick for almost two weeks, finances didn't look that great, and my heart felt like it needed some major mending. It was a gloomy day so my first thought was to go home, make some tea, put on my pajamas and sleep. It was only 3 p.m. Once I left the bank I decided that if there was ever a time to call upon spiritual tools, this was it. So instead of going home, I decided to go to the Marriott and check out a healer named Braco (pronounced Brautzo) that I had heard was doing a "gazing" every hour on the hour. A friend had informed me that his voice would also be heard during the final gazing; a rare treat since he hasn't spoke...

"I'm sorry we didn't do anything exciting." My friend's apology came after a leisurely day filled with time at her home with her husband and kids and a brief shopping excursion. I was visiting her for three days to keep her company as she had just had surgery. I told her that I was okay with relaxing and that she didn't need to entertain me with something "exciting". Her apology made me think about how it seems that at times we all become addicted to entertainment, excitement, or DRAMA. If something isn't happening that's worthy of a Facebook post or even a "tall tale" to entertain friends with, we think life is boring. Or maybe that's just me or someone you know. The truth that I know is that being given the opportunity to engage in life itself is amazing, exciting, and worthy of a Facebook post! To have the opportunity to live, breathe, and have our experiences in this body, in this now is more than worthy of celebrati...

If you live outside of Southern California, you don't EVEN want to know what the weather is like today. You'd hate me. Eighty degrees in March! I took a walk by the beach today. I always learn something on my walks, but today I wasn't really looking for a lesson-I just wanted to take in some sunshine and ocean energy. As I walked on The Strand in Manhattan Beach, I took in the ocean, the birds, the surfers, and all the children being pushed in strollers. And then there were the dogs. I noticed a woman walking a black and white dog. I noticed that the woman was going at a pretty good clip, walking in the opposite direction. All of the sudden, mid-stride, the dog lay down. Belly to cement, tongue hanging out, done. It was as if the dog suddenly said, "forget this mess. I'm taking a breather." The woman walking the dog quickly saw the futility of pulling the leash as it was clear that the dog wasn't going anywhere. This was an instance where I truly did LM...

Recently I had the opportunity to attend an event and serve as a healer. While there was a lull in the action, another healer asked me to do a trade; I would facilitate a visioning session for him and he would balance my chakras (no, that isn't a euphemism). Since my healing ability is a newly-found talent, I was a little nervous. See, this healer I mention has been doing healings for a long time--over ten years. In fact, when I used to attend healing events, before I recognized my own ability to heal, he was always in attendance as a healer. I thought to myself, "what can I possibly offer him? He has WAY more experience than I do." I recognized these thoughts as just another version of "who do you think you are?" Then I remembered that it isn't me that does the work. I am simply a vehicle through which God expresses. So it didn't really matter how much experience I have or don't have as long as I'm willing to put my ego aside and allow myself...

Yesterday I had an interesting experience. I am generally a peace-loving, conflict-avoiding person. But yesterday, I wanted to curse someone out! My colleague and I met to conduct some business. I had parked in one hour parking as the business we were due to complete would not take very long. After we had been meeting for about forty five minutes, I told her that I would have to move my car or feed the meter so that I wouldn't get a ticket and that I would return to sign the second stack of paperwork as needed. She immediately became angry and asked me why I couldn't just sign the papers before I left. She said that she had to get going. I promised her that I would return quickly as I had other appointments that day as well, but she would not budge. Then she went into what I will describe as a rant, about how everything is done at my convenience and she is sick of it. After trying to reason with her and talk to her about how we've compromised in our work together all year...

I am really clear about my roles in life. I know that I am a writer, a daughter, an educator, a speaker, a female, etc. Lately, however, I have stepped into a new role--healer. It started with an invitation from a dear friend, a brother really, to serve as a healer at his birthday celebration. He is a gifted theta healer and his idea was to have healers from several different modalities provide their services, at a very nominal cost, so that all participants had the opportunity to be exposed to healing modalities they may not have tried before. He was calling it A Day of Wholeness. I'd been to similar gatherings before and was excited about sampling some things myself--massage, energy healing; yes to all. Yet, when he asked me to serve as one of the healers, that role didn't seem to fit me. Sure, I am great at visioning and my intuition is really strong. I've been able to share some important information with people that has helped them. I didn't think that I had eno...

Last Tuesday I delivered a speech called, “Staring Down a Squirrel: How to Remain Positive and Productive During an Economic Downturn.” What God gave me to say was spectacular, inspiring, and awesome all around. Even though I didn’t have a microphone as promised and my Mac was not on speaking terms with the Powerpoint projector (don’t ask), I was able to deliver the talk with ease and grace. I felt inspired and from the feedback I received from the group, they felt inspired as well. That Saturday, the day after payday, I no longer felt inspired because I started worrying about money. As I wrote out checks for bills, I started to recognize that the total amount of bills would certainly be greater than the total amount of money I’d received. I felt myself taking those shallow, worried breaths that fear inspires. Funny, how the Universe works. It seems as though as soon as I started worrying about money, the Universe started calling upon me to produce more abundance. First, a frien...

This morning when I awoke, I prayed for God to speak through me. I prayed that I would be a beneficial presence today and I set my intention to be love wherever I went. I was scheduled to speak at a community center in West Los Angeles at ten. When I arrived at about fifteen minutes before I was scheduled to speak, I met the activities director. She was a warm woman from Vienna and as we waited in the conference room for the attendees, we started talking. She was studying hypnotherapy, pursuing a master's degree online, and working full time. She spoke of how although she has lived here for eight years, living in Los Angeles was difficult to get used to. While seniors enjoyed breakfast in the next room, we talked about the importance of community and the difficulty some seniors face in creating one for themselves. We discovered that our birthdays are one day apart (mine January 17th and hers the 18th). By ten a.m., I was certain that I would not have an audience to speak to--...

This week I was asked to contribute to the creation of an altar representing release. I struggled with what to bring. Then I remembered a God jar I'd created. Two years ago, I was taking a spiritual course and learned about a ritual of using a jar to release any problems that I was facing to God. So I created a God jar, wrote all my problems on Post It notes and sealed them in the plastic jar. On top of the lid, I attached another Post It note which read something like, "These problems are being handled by God. My highest good is done now." I did not stop thinking about those problems right away; however, two years later I can honestly say that I do not remember the problems that seemed so overwhelming that I chose to give them to God by placing them in that jar. That is grace. Have I been tempted to open the jar and take a peek? Yes! Of course! I even imagined that someday I'd add more worries to the jar at some point. Yet, somehow I've come to think of that j...